...and being that I'm an accommodating sort of girl, here they are.
Ever since my recent introduction to the art of
woven bacon, the whole bacon-weaving compulsion just wouldn't let me go until I found the time to make this.
As it is in the baconning, and ever shall be, forever and ever, bacon without end. Whack it in half.
Take the half-pieces, and commence to weaving. Lay out three pieces, and start almost as you would for a lattice piecrust.
Half woven:
And there they are, ready for the oven. Mine go in at 375 degrees for about twenty minutes, but you'd better use whatever technique/temperature work best in your oven.
Now we move on to taties, because they make us happy. Undress a few taties.
Now, I have issues with shredded taties, probably flashbacks from one too many bad diner breakfasts on the road, so I just chip them up tiny. Put them in the iciest ice water you've got to keep them bright.
When you're ready, drain the taties and turn them into a pan with some melty butter.
Jingle the taties around until they're
almost tender -- I fake it and throw in some water and cover them to partially steam them -- then when they're almost done, let them sit to get golden in between tosses.
When your taties are sizzling you've got a moment to start some eggs, and scramble them up.
There! By now, you've got all the components at the ready.
Place the bacon
make a little "nest" of taties on top of it
then put scrambled eggs in the nest. Garnish with breakfasty vegetation.
You know you'd slam your face into that. Repeatedly.
